"The Day of the Dead"

Ok, As all of you know, Im Mexican, and in my country we celebrate "The day of the dead" If you want to know what is this, check it out:

We've been celebrating this date for hundreds of years. We think that the November 2th, our relatives (dead, of course!) come to visit us to our places... they (or their souls) have permision to be in the living people's world just for a day. So, people use to put an "altar" in their homes with the favorite stuffs that the dead person used to eat when he or she was alive.
We put in the Altar all this things: Candles (to light their way), Flowers ("senpasuchil" I dont know whats the name of this flower in english, but some people call it "the flower of deads". People think that the smell of this flower hepls them to find the way to their homes), their favorit meal (Of course, Mexican food, Tequila, sigarrets, candies, coffe, etc.), for the children toys.
My grandma put the altar in the living room. At 12:00 am she opens the door to let our relatives souls in to the house.
Here in Guadalajara there's a cementery named "Panteon de Belen". Every year in the middle of the place at 12:00 Pm they make a play about the Dead. This cementery has like 600 year-old, and it has a lot of stories. I've been going for 2 years. The sensation is amazing, be in the middle of a cementery, in the middle of the night, watching a play about the dead...

We respect the dead, and we remember this day our loved people that is not here anymore.

But, we have too our tipical humor sense, as all Mexican people, we laugh of the dead too. We make jokes about the dead.

Well.... I guess thats all..... thanks for taking the time to read this.
NOTE: If you see some mistakes, IM SORRY.... I have bad ortography in spanish and in english too. Damn me!!!! :P

hey, Its been a while since the last time I wrote here.

Anyway, Im still alive.... so, dont worry about me Ok?? (as if anybody cares!! )

I've been really busy..... I dont even have time to write in my little book... Im broken... I have no money......

Uh, let me see.... whats the news??(I dont remember) Is going to be "The day of the dead" Thats a very important date in the Mexican culture... Nov. 2 . My grandma is going to put her Altar as usual in this date.

I've been having a lot of problems with my damn computer....

I like mota... (note: Mota is a last name not a drug!)

Btw, I dont have money...

We all are always too busy that we dont even bother to stop and see some of the most inportants and cool things of being alive... wath the sky, the mon, the sun..... breath.

Did I mencioned that I dont have money????

Is going to be Robert's b-day..... so, we're going to party this weekend...... Im going...... cya

Monday, I hate mondays...

Its 4:32 pm and Im really bored. The phone is draving me nuts! Always on Mondyas it doesnt stop ringing...

I cooked yesterday for all my family "Camarones a la Diabla" (seafood). It was fun... Here in Mexico, we have a saying that all the people use when someone cook they say: "Can I get married already?" and if the meal was good they answer: "yeah, you do!"
Its a very old saying, I guess that it comes from when the woman's place was at home, cooking and taking care of the children.

Im begining a new week, and all I can think about is : "when is going to be friday again?"

The last friday was one of my classmates b-day, all the class coopered to buy a cake for him, then after school, we had planned to go to a some bar... so we did it...we were on our way there when Bayo's truck (with Julio, Dany, Robert inside of it) stoped in the middle of Federalismo Av. Silvia, El primo, Martin and I were on Francisco's car behind Bayo's truck, so he parked the truck the next street and so we did, then arrived Myriam, Jeaninne, Blanca in Rosy's car and she parked the car to.
The guys were trying to fix Bayo's truck and we stayed there listening music... 10 minuts after they were still trying to fix it... 20 min... 25... 30 min... we were driving ourselves nuts... next act Silvia took the cake and made us sing Happy Birthday to Martin in the middle of the street all stangind next to the cars... at 10:00 pm with docens of cars passing next to us... that was soooo much fun!
After the little song... we all ate cake there... and after 1 HOUR the truck was working again. So, we went to "Solé Bar" for some drinks, we had a great time there... I didnt drink too much. (I dont use to drink too much anyway)

Next day.... school.... I arrived late... as always after a Bar night... in the evening I had a dissagreetment with my Mother... she insist to try me as a 15-year-old girl. So, they left to some reuninon with my uncle political's family. I stayed in home by myself. Crying. As a 15-years-old girl. I hate argue with my mother... or with anybody. This time I said what I felt. I know I hurted her. But... she just doesnt understad what I feel. She doesnt understad that Im not like my sister. Im not my sister. So yeah, I stayed there crying. Then I went to bed. It was 10:00 pm.
The next morning (Sunday) I waked up at 10:30 am... after 12 and a half hours... I dont remember when was the last time I slept so much time. As I said I cooked.... and had a great time with my family the next dat. My mom?? She was like nothing happened. She es really weard!

IS IT FRIDAY ALREADY..... AGAIN????????? Man!!!! the time is passing so fast recently!!!!!! If it keeps passing so fast ...... I'll be 80 TOMORROW!!!!!

Im in my office and my boss is not here....... YES!!!!! he is in some kind of exposition about autoparts or something. So, Im all alone.

Since this site is for me, I mean, to expres my feelings and every stupid crap thats runing in my mind I want to write personal stuffs today and here are my confesions : (wait...... Do I have secrets???? I didnt know that......)

1. I am "adicta a la academia" YES...... I cant live whitout watch it every day!
2. I love "Chetos".
3. I hate myself sometimes.
4. I like Julio and Aldo, but just for a "fajecillo". I'd never have something serious with any of them. (but, Im a chicken in person, so, I could never do anything with them...)
5. I like to dance banda... (I just like to dance it, not listen it)
6. In my opinion Blanca is the most ugly woman I've ever seen... (but she is my friend!!)
7. Im in love with Clayton. (BUT... he doent know about my existense!)
8. Im really intelligent....
9. Im not so virgin....(Im mean, Im virgen coz, my first time was with... well, him.... and, we couldnt finish, I mean.... he didnt enter completly on me..... you know what I mean?? so then.... Yes, Im virging.)
10. I believe in true love.
11. I thing that all of us have a "Soul-mate" (but, Its hard to find the correct fish in this big ocean)
12. I cry when I see a romantic, sentimental and lovely movie.
13. I think that nobody really know me.
14. I think that the world could be better if we dedicate to live our own lifes and let the other people alone.
15. I care a shit what people think about me.
16. I hate the phone...
17. I never let people see directly into my eyes... when Im talking with someone I see them in the face but... not in the eyes... I feel like naked when they want to see my eyes.... Is my weak side.... I feel like If I let someone do it... he is going to see my soul and that make me feel vulnerable....
18. When I see a guy I see first his face, then his theet, his hands... and then his shoes... (I dont know why! )
19. I feel lonely almost always.
20. If I could be in jeans and shirts all the time, I'd be happy.
21. I want to live in some place near to the beach... I love the ocean, and the sand .....
22. If I could be an animal I'd definetly be a bird... they are free..... and they just fly..... and go away.... whenever they want.
23. I love touch the air... it makes my feel alive... (try to touch it..... )
24. Pretty girls are stupid.
25. I love sleep!!!!!
26. My pijamas are men pijamas... and I love them.
27. I hate my uncle's political family.
28. I hate my "dad" (he just run away..... and forgot about us)
29. I love to read stories in the net...
30. I love my friends.
31. I dont want to die.
32. I have thought in suicide a lot if times.
33. I dont like argue with anybody.
34. I hate when people yell.
35. I love kids... and I hope to have my owns someday.
36. I envy Silvia (one my best friends) she is soooo responsable.... that I envy that determination to do things... Im A MESS!
37. I think that Im a little girl in a womans body.



well....... thats it...... I'll put something else next time........

HAVE A NICE WEEKEND!!!!!!

Ok, Im almost done..... Its 5:35 Pm and Im still working..... waiting for the 6:00 pm to run to the school. Another monotony day in my monoty live making monotony things and watching monotony people walking in the streets.... in this monotony city..... (uh.... did I type "Monotony" correctly???..... nevermind).

I need....... I need...... I even dont know what the hell I need...I need..... a boyfriend.... a change of life..... move to other city..... die???

What the hell Im talking about???

I NEED TO GO PEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll be right back!!!!!........ dont go away....... :o)

Im back!!!! What a great sensation!! when you almosy pee your pants.... and go to the toilet and do your things there...... wow....lol

Im writing a lot of stupid crap here...... so, Im going.... c ya.....

Im hungry! really hungry..... I need something to eat, but........ Im sick...... My stomach hurts...... and..... well, lets just say that Im sick.
I need a nap to. I stayed last night watching a movie and now Im all sleepy. I saw "American Beauty"
I dont undestand why that movie won a lot of awards...Oscars and everything.. In my opinion its not that great, I heard once that it shows perfectly the "Tipical American Family" WTH??? I mean, all the "American Families" are like that one in the movie????
If it is so, well... thats really a shame. Im not saying that my culture or anything of us is better.. but... well, in Mexico is VERY diferent. The priority of every person in my country is The family. The family is first.

I love my country and our culture...

Friday afeternoon, Its rainig outside but the sun is still shining... amazing!! those kind of thinks make life worth...

I've been thinking about what Tere and Isra told me, and Im agree with them... I should start to take my own desitions..

I wish I could be in other place right now... I wish I could fly and leave all behind... I wish I could forget who I am for a moment, be another person... I wish I could desapire....

Its still raining outside.... smell delicious..... that caracteristic smell when it rains and the earth get wet... I love it!

Im going... I'll try to enjoy my weekend...

I have a lot of things in my mind... I wish I could stop thinking!! Stop!!!!!

I need to sleep!!!! I realy need to.... but, instead of it im here in my office "working".....

The good news of the day is that ITS FRIDAY! thank you, thank you, thank you!!!

I just read something in Clayton's blog that maked me think.... well he writed something last night when he was drunk, and now that he is sober ..... well whatever...

I just think that, sometimes our subconsent part speaks for us, and then our consent part is stronger that the other, but.... wait !!! I dont know what the hell I am writing......
what I want to say is that sometimes we know that we really want something, but we cant admit it.... I always say to my friends the same: "Im fine, I dont need anybody in my life now, I cant have anybody" but the truth is totaly diferent... I feel alone, And nobody knows it...
Who Am I trying to fool??? Myself??? I should try to be more honest with myself....

wey!!!!! ya tenia un chingo de dias que no actualizaba esta mother, pero ......... no tenia maquina y el estupido de alejando que antes me gustaba y ahora ni regalado lo quiero no me la entregaba, aunque quedo mas madriada de lo que estaba.--

Por otro lado, todo va ......... no se, ....... como va??? bueno, digamos que simplemente VA.........

cada vez se ve mas imposible lo que Canada..........

I havent done anything... Oh yeah I did something....... I fail the stupid English test.........

Could I be more stupid???? Man, I've been studying English for 3 damn years...... and now, when I need to do my best I fail the exam!!
I dont think that the teacher is going to make me repit the course..... anyways.... What can I do???

Btw, I've been reading clayton's blog.... and I like the way he is....... Is really a shame that he is living thousands of miles away from here........
May be I should move to USA...... lol......

I guess Im going to start to write all my posts in english....

I need to get out of here....... I need to go out!!!!!!! I need a bar!!!!! lol.... (Im not alcoholic ok??) its just that I need to go out and relax, be with my friends.... the cure of all my stress is just Friends, Beers, Good music... and a Good talk.......

In other order of ideas.. I guess that I need a Boyfriend..... coz, I feel that ..... I really want to.... you know....... fall soooo deeply in love with someone.......

Call me crazy but I really need someone in my life...... I've been alone for..... 2 years (more or less) Im 24 years old..... im cute, nice, smart..... what mote can you ask for??? LOL.